Back Home

After a train journey or 8 hours, I finally set foot back in KL. It would have been an ardous journey, if it was not for Matt and Paul. They are good travelling companions. Upon arriving home, mom and dad brought them around to eat, Bak Kut Teh and also a great lunch. It was a great time also because my aunt cooked for dinner. I am really thankful to God for all these things. He has been really great to me. I'll post up the pics next time round..


However, since today is only Day 1 of my return, I have yet reach my objectives. I truly am confused at the moment. I do not know what is right and what is wrong. I am seeking earnestly form God. Apart from that, my old self is acting up again. I guessed it's time to gird up the loins of my mind and be prepared for a great war and battle... I seek God for His strength and guidance.

Passion?

The thing I am searching for, and yet, it being elusive. For now, I stretch out my arm, and I could not reach it. I could not get near. I ask myself each time, I question my existence. I question my experience, I question my motivation. I question it all. And yet, I could not find any.

What is my passion?
What drives me?
What makes me tick?
What makes me cry?
What makes me question?
What are my talents?
What blessings can I give to the world?
What tires me?
What leads me home?


Mind to share?

Wake Up Call Now!

It was a crude wake-up call to me. Yet, how timely it was. Right on monday, my lecturer for YKT 214 gave us some in-class assignments and discussions. And in that activity, me and a few other friends were asked to be a panel to discuss 2 questions.

1) Based on the statement, discuss. The statement made was regarding the nature of control over access to media. it says that although there is access, the access is made useless when large transational media corporations and certain government controls its direction.

2) To what extent can ICT be used to assisst minority groups?

Why is it a wake-up call to me? During our discussion, I realised that whatever the answer was, I knew it. But the bad part was my organisation being poor. I could not focus, neither could I be decisive. It was a realisation that, I can no longer run away from God. I can no longer use excuses and the stress around me, to let me be comfortable and pitied. Furthermore, I should not wallow in my despair, for God is there to pick me up.

And now, I make my choice and stand. Be it difficult and full of challenges, I have to let God pick me up and lead me on. I have decided to be a man of faith, and give me all in my remaining semesters. The time has come for me, to trust and depend on God. Who else can I do the same?

For family and friends that were with me in this journey, I greatly thank you. No words would suffice to express my gratitude. I will now move on......

Wake Up Call!!

I got a wake up call...more on that later.

Fellowship

(Malaysia Campus Crusade for Christ Hi-tea event)

(Ryan, Me and Alex)

(Child dedication service)

Things about fellowship is strange. It is just mind-boggling to think that a few mortal beings could converse and share some experiences of their lives for a couple of hours, and still have more to share the next time round.

Today, or rather 12 sumthing int he morning. me and teo close friends shared on some principles regarding some important matters. We articulated our opinions, we made certain things clear. We shook our head in disagreements on certain issues, but nodded on others. It's a great time. The thing is, its sad, to see something that should glorify God, not doing so. It brings a grim reminder to me of God's grace and providence. With Him nothing is impossible.

Oh, I went for Malaysia Campus Crusade for Christ's 40th Anniversary, hi-tea functio today. The CF president could not make it, so I went on his behalf (the church did sponsor...) Anyways, here are some beautiful pics, and I seriously meant it.

Me, joan, and bro. Gan

(Me and Joan, I borrowed Matt's shirt coz need to be matching to hers!)

(She looks stunning, but the thing is, its just bro and sis-in-Christ!, we thought it was a black tie event)

(Okay, u caught me SS)

Two-Face

It has been some challenging days. This is due to the fact that I am battling some struggle that I have. And in response to that situation, I have decided to de-stress and help out whoever, or what ever I could, albeit with conscious choice. But anyhow, I did help out my friend, the lynx, to prepare her FYP (finay year project) . It entails spraying condensed milk cans with black paint. And that was what we did. Funny thing was, the way I held the can, ended up making my fingers black (with spray paint) on 1 side. I then decided that It would be like Two-Face, a nemesis of Batman. ....Lo and behold!


It wasn't really bad, helping out a friend. But other than that, I was also able to talk to many other people during this time of trial for me. I choose those I could trust, and I shared ym struggle with them. In the end, I was greatly encouraged. I know that I have made friends that God has prepared for me. Those who were there and those who gave support. Thanks y'all! There is much more road we need to walk....

Somethin for every one!!

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God's greatness!!

Many a times, we could not find the right word for the situation. We could not give the right response and we may not be able to make the wise choice at the moment. There are times, we have been stumped, where we could not even know what should we do, Times like this, we search and we look, for the book which tells us what to do. We seek for refuge in incomprehensible ways and we even hurt those we seek to protect. We feel weak and lonely, vulnerable and defensive, confused and angered. But what should we do? Do we not know of God's mercy? Do we not enjoy His ever soothing peace? Do we forget of His flowing providence and His everlasting strength?

Let it not be so. Rather, may we rise up from our ashes, may we stir from our slumber, may we fly out from our pit of despair. For in our weakness lies God's strength. In it, we can truly experience the joy that nothing else gives, the peace that goes through the storm, the comfort that embalms the deepest wounds. It is not us being helpless that amuses God! But it is us, knowing full well that He looks from the heavens, smiling at us, going through life, and depending on Him. With Him in our heart and life, what more can we ask? Riches? Money is cheap and lasts but a while.

There are meaningful things that money will never be able to buy. Success? But that too is fleeting, for what does it mean to be successful, if we could not pay for our own sins, nor could we be more righteous than the ragged sinner we are. Grades, careers, knowledge? Is it not ironic, when at times, all the knowledge of this world, is mere foolishness to God? Doesn't He knows already? Salvation? Nothing can be of more value, than where we would be spending eternity. Nothing can take away our sins but Christ's sacrifice. Nothing would suffice the grave nor the eternal damnation, but Him alone.

So, what should I do then? Depress my self? Ignore those who are trying to help me? Far be it from me! It should now be a time for me, to grow in Christ, and let Him lead me, where He knows best. Whatever may come, let Christ's greatness be. I know for sure, that He is there to guide me, to comfort me, to love me, to counsel me, to rebuke me, to pick me up, to give me peace, to lift me across oceans and mountains, to hold me close in His arms, to shelter me from harm, to build me up, to encourage me, to mould me, to give me hope, to let me be, to reach out to me, to provide for me, to never let me go, to never leave me alone, to be there, every, single, step, I, take. One, at, a, time. Just there, just right.